Yesterday, Self Care looked like reaching out for support from my Spiritual Mama and my SOFT Sisters in the SOFT incubator because I was literally about to lose AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALL my shit with our children and our morning “Get Ready for School Routine.” #SOFTMuseling
It looked like enjoying a few Haaaaaaaaa breaths to calm myself and recenter myself after the morning fiasco, while waiting for a group of screaming pre-teen girls to descend upon my vehicle with their K-Pop and J-Pop and C-Pop playlists. (I am blessed enough to be able to be a Parent Chaperone on all of the Science field trips).
It looked like setting my Science degree and all of my research and lab experience to the side (aka, my ego) and allowing the lab assistants to do all of the working with the children, while I just hung back and played a more supportive role.
It looked like not allowing myself to feel the pressure to “perform.”
It looked like getting back to the school from the field trip an hour-and-a-half before school let out and NOT feeling obligated to pick my children up early.
Instead, it looked like taking that extra time and treating myself to Fufu and Egusi at one of my favorite Nigerian restaurants where one of the servers always refers to me as “Princess” and where I can sit right in front of the TV, reach behind the counter and grab the remote, and turn the volume up on the Nigerian movie, because of course, I came in AFTER the beginning of the movie, so I need to be able to hear EVERYTHING so I could piece the storyline together.
It looked like allowing myself to fully enjoy the experience, even talking to the television
“Giiiirl! Is THAT what happened to your babies! Now you KNEW that man was a JuJu man when you married him. Oh, so now that it affects YOU, oh NOOOOW you wanna cry! Giiiiirrrrl BYE!”
It looked like watching a lady come in with her adult son, who seemed to be autistic and listening to her speak so harshly to him and even smacking the table to threaten him and wanting sooo badly to go over to her and flip the table on her,
But then recognizing that we are all reflections and that which I see also has the capacity to dwell in me, then remembering….
“There was a time when YOU spoke harshly to YOUR children as well…”
And then choosing to look at her, with love, catch her eye contact, hold her eye contact, tilt my head, slightly to the left, and softly nod my head at her, as if to say…
“I see you Sis. I see you.”💗
She changed her tone…
And I was able to continue enjoying my experience.
It looked going straight to sleep, as soon as we got home, WITHOUT feeling guilty, because my body was calling for rest.
It looked like remaining at rest for as long as I needed to, so that when my King came to me to be his Oasis after work, I had more than enough energy to serve him.
It looked like checking Facebook last night and realizing Facebook was having some issues and choosing to WAIT to post this, until today, instead of allowing myself to be frustrated with technology.
Yesterday, Self Care looked like finding opportunities for Rest and Nourishment, in the middle of responsibility.
Nothing extravagantly planned.
Nothing that would be seemingly glorious on the surface.
Just finding the openings and creating the space.
And for me,
🧜🏾♀️I Love You, Sis😘
Want to go deeper? We can…